150 Funny Valentine Messages for Friends

Funny valentine messages for friends: Make your partner laugh with these funny Valentine’s messages! Everyone loves to make our partner smile. On this day you see that your partner feels good and is happy and smiling throughout the day.  We have made our efforts to get you the best funny valentines messages and make this valentine day a remarkable one. We hope you enjoy these funny Valentines messages.

Funny Valentine Messages for Friends

Roses are red, violets are blue, if you don’t spoil me today, then I will kill you!

Someone told me that Saint Valentine is not only the patron saint of love, but also of fainting, epilepsy and the plague. It all sounds like the same thing to me!

If you won’t be my Valentine, you’ll regret it! I am so damn sweet and loving and if you don’t treat me that way I’ll make your life miserable! You better love me you idiot!

Happy Valentine’s Day to all my friends! If you have someone special, enjoy your day with them. If you are single, enjoy not having to spend a bunch of money and waiting in line for a table at a restaurant!

My Valentine’s Day recipe for you: 1/2 cup of hugs, 2/3 cup of kisses, 4 oz of snuggles and 10 lbs of chocolate!

Let’s pretend for one day that we love each other more than anything else. We can avoid each other for the rest of 364 days!

Whoever said Valentine’s day is only for lovers? I love you my best friend!

I am not saying that I care about money more than I do about you. But it’s my father’s advice to spend my money on good purposes only!

I love you even more than chocolate and candy. Happy Valentines Day to the love of my life!

I’m going to spend Valentine’s day with my true love…my phone!

Roses are red, violets are blue, this candy is sweet and so are you.

Valentine’s Day reminds me of our childhood together when we used to fight over the last piece of chocolate and now I would give anything to share the last piece of chocolate with you.

I love you even more than my iPhone. Happy Valentines Day my love!

Cute Funny Valentine Messages for Friends

Is it just me or is it a little creepy that Valentine’s Day is represented by fat babies carrying around bows and arrows?

I am on a diet so feel free to buy me diamonds instead of chocolates or flowers this Valentine’s Day.

My friend, I wasn’t sure if it is ok to send a Valentine’s message to a friend, so if it is ok, consider this my Valentine’s wish to you, if not, then happy just-another-day to you!

I went looking for funny Valentine messages and all I found was this useless sentence!

I don’t need silly gifts like flowers or chocolate on Valentine’s Day, jewelry will do just fine.

All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt ….Happy Valentines Day

Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.

Girl: “I can’t be your valentine for medical reasons.” Boy: “Really?” Girl: “Yeah, you make me sick!”

What happened when the man fell in love with his garden? A: It made him wed his plants!

Valentine’s day is only a few days away…………so remember it’s not too late… break up and save money…..

You’re quite a catch! But don’t feel too bad even good offers sometimes have a catch! Funny Valentine messages!

I found a card for you in time, I really did. And it said exactly how I feel about you. But it was so mushy the envelope went all soggy!

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

Best Friend Funny Valentine Messages for Friends

I wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day with all my heart, and lungs, and liver, and spleen..

This Valentines day if love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?

What kind of flowers do you never give on Valentine’s Day? Cauliflowers!

“My heart was made to be broken.”

It seems 2 have luvd u in numberless 4ms, numberless times in life after life, in age after age 4ever.

100 hearts would b 2 few,2 carry all my luv 4 u. Dear Alcohol….. Will you be my Valentine?

I am opening an emotional bank account for u sweet heart, so deposit your love in it and you will get the interest.

If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

I was thinking how proud she would be to be a part of the technology crowd.

Darling, you seem to get more beautiful everyday, but I refuse to wear glasses!

What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream?”I’m sweet on you”.

What did the boy owl say to the girl owl on Valentine’s Day? Owl be yours.

Read Also:  Unbelievable Valentines Day Messages For Girlfriend Long Distance

Happy Funny Valentine Messages for Friends

Whoever said Valentine’s day is only for lovers? I love you my best friend!

Love is in the air! So don’t hold your breath!

Love is a game that two can play and both win.

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn’t want him to.

When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out.

Each moment of a happy luvr’s hour is worth an age of dull & common life.

Q. What I need 2 live has been given 2 me by the earth. Why I need 2 lives has been given 2 me by you.

Q. What did the paper clip say to the magnet? A: I find you very attractive.

Q. What did the girl squirrel say to the boy squirrel on Valentine’s Day? A: I’m nuts about you!

Q. What did the boy bird say to the girl bird on Valentine’s Day?A. Let me call you Tweet heart!

Q: What did the valentine card say to the stamp? A: Stick with me and we’ll go places!

Q: Who sends a thousand valentines cards signed’, guess who?” A: A divorce lawyer.

To all my single friends. If no one else loves you, I do.

Through all the things that came to pass, our love has grown… but so’s your ass.

If you think that hickey looks like a blister. You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!

Access 151+Valentine’s Day Messages For Girlfriend 

Funny Valentine Messages for Friends and Family

You are so lucky to have me – and vice versa!

From now till forever, I will always stand by you. My love for you is not S or L, it is XXXL! Happy Valentine’s Day!

You are my sweetest Valentine, I love you like a fat kid loves cake. Funny Valentine Messages for Friends! cookies.

From the moment I set eyes on you, I knew I was going to do this. Happy Valentine’s day, my frog, I turned you into a prince. I adore you!

You are my sun that lights up my life, but also gives me sunburns sometimes. Love you to the sun and back.

People say love is blind, but to me, no, it is not. My love for you has opened my eyes to all your faults – and yet, I still love you! Happy Valentine’s Day, my love.

I know love can sometimes change, and feelings can often be strange. Yet, how I feel is not a mystery, I love you even more than biscuit and tea! Happy Valentine’s Day!

You didn’t steal my heart, you just hacked into my brain. I sometimes even forget my name when I am with you. Happy Valentine’s day, my sweetest baby.

Happy Valentine’s Day my bae! I have resisted the nicest things in my life, but it does seem you are irresistible. Because, you are my only temptation – in every way. Let’s enjoy the day.

People say life is a race, but run at your own pace. However, I can’t even walk without you with me in this race. You have become my legs, and my every single thing. Happy Valentine’s Day, love.

Funny Valentine Messages for Him

Let’s go to the bedroom and lose some weight.

My day – no, my life, is incomplete without you. I adore you, my love candy. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Love is blind – this is so true. How mad I am to fall in love with you. Bah – never mind! Happy Valentine’s to you.

Lilies are white, while brinjals are purple. My love for you baby, is getting double. Have an amazing Valentine’s Day.

Your farts are your cutest feature, except for the days we eat radishes. Then, baby, I want to kick you out. Happy Valentine’s day, dear!

Roses are red, and baby, so are you, when you blush, I feel sooo good. Happy Valentine’s day, bugs bunny. You are the best part of my day!

Don’t forget how we look like now. Some day, we will get wrinkly and old. However, the best part about it is we will get wrinkly and old together. Happy Valentine’s, love!

You are my one true love, the love of my life, my one true hubby. Excuse me, I am not talking to you! I am talking to my BMW! Bye, I am going to spend my day with my Valentine.

For every hour I spend away from you, my boo, I want to complement it with two hours. So that we can talk throughout the night. Hehe. But, it will only be talk, though. Happy Valentine’s Day!

In this world, there are billions of people. Among all, you chose to be with me, even though I am batshit ugly. You are a lucky man! Happy Valentine’s Day.

I am so happy to be the “one” of your life. You are the second living thing to love me so completely; the first were mosquitoes, not even my mommy. Happy Valentine’s Day, booboo.

If you ever break my heart, I swear I will break all your bones. So baby, don’t ever dare to cheat on me. I love you loads. I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

Beautiful moments like these make me feel I should hire someone to take photos of us. That’s how happy you make me feel.

Funny Valentine Messages for Her

Without you, I am just a cat, but with you, I am a tiger. Happy VD, lovebug.

I can’t wait to rip your clothes off when we get married. I love you so much, darling. Happy Valentine’s day.

You are the topping of my favorite ice-cream. I pray this ice-cream never ever melts. Have an amazing Valentine’s Day.

Words are just not enough to express my love for you. Maybe my stupid face can. Wishing you a very happy Valentine’s Day.

Happy Valentine’s day, love. Do not follow the advice of friends who say you shouldn’t marry a girl like me. The truth is, they want to marry me, but I chose you. Stick with me, darling.

My friend, you are the only guy I think of every day, and I really don’t know why, but I guess it could be love. I love you now and forever. HVD!

You are definitely an essential nutrient in my body. Without you, I would probably get rickets. Funny Valentine Messages! my love.

Today, I want to ensure whether you will end up marrying me. Darling, let’s flip a coin, shall we? If it is heads, I am yours, and if it is tails, you are mine. C’mon, it’s a fair deal. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Could life ever be complete without you? Would it mean anything at all without you? I guess it may be if someone prettier comes along. Lol. But for now, there’s you. Happy Valentine’s Day, my love.

Happy Valentine’s Day, my love. I am so happy you could finally love me. Now, baby, I can die in peace. I hope we die together when we do. But, darling, let’s enjoy today first.

Bikes can’t stand on their own because they are two-tired. Same in my case. I would be too tired to spend my life without you. Happy Valentine’s Day, love.

Also Read: Nice Valentine Messages For Wife

Funny Valentine Messages for Girlfriend

I have no Valentine’s date! Anyway, it’s okay, food is love, food is life.

“Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.” – Oscar Wilde.

“In case I forget to tell you later, I had a really good time tonight.” — Pretty Woman

“If love is the answer, then could you rephrase the question?” — Lily Tomlin.

” Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love” — Albert Einstein.

“The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing—and then marry him.” — Cher

“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” – Joan Crawford

“By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates

“The thing about Valentine’s day is that people discover who are single and who to feel jealous of.” — Faye Morgan

“Oh here’s an idea: let’s make pictures of our internal organs and give them to other people we love on Valentine’s Day. That’s not weird at all.” — Jimmy Fallon

“Remember, your Valentine’s card shows you care enough to send the very best, even though you’re too lazy to put it in your own words.” – Melanie White.

Read More: Happy Valentines Day My Love 

Funny Valentine Messages for Boyfriend

Lots of love, tons of kisses, I hope that one day, I will be your Missus!

Doing nothing with you means everything to me! Happy Valentine’s Day to my everything.

Nice suit! But do you know what would look better on you than that? Me!

If you will be my Valentine, I will hold you very close, I will give you a kiss, as well as a little red rose!

There is one thing I know – money can’t buy love! But maybe it can buy lots of love? I will make loads of money – and get loads of love from you. Happy Valentine’s Day!

I have been wondering how to tell you how much I love you. I wish I was present there when you were born; I would have just married you straight away so that we could spend more time together! Happy Valentine’s Day, love.

Before I met you, nothing else mattered to me than family and friends. But now, I live like nothing else matters other than you. Happy Valentine’s Day, cutie.

This Valentine’s won’t just pass you by, for darling Cupid is flying in the sky. He can see the love I got for you, his arrow is sharp, and the aim is true. He will never miss, nor shall I, I will love you always – until the day I die.

Every single day, I fall more and more in love with you. Except on those days when you really irritate me. Fortunately for you, today is not that day!

Happy Valentine’s Day! It is always so bewildering that the least smart guy in the class gets the most beautiful girl.

I hope I am not coming onto you too strongly, but can these intense feelings be so wrong? I want to get to know you so much more, Don’t you dare leave Saint Valentine at the door!

Funny Valentine Messages for Fiance

Happy Valentine’s Day to Me! To love myself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.

I wish you a very happy Valentine’s Day – with all my heart, lungs, spleen, and liver!

People say love is stupid; I guess I am a fool then! You are the most beautiful guy to me! Happy VD!

Don’t try to be cool when you are hanging out with me; you look like a fool. Happy Valentine’s.

You are the candy crush game that I love to play daily. Happy Valentine’s Day.

I know you will give me that chocolate stained toothy smile today that I soooo love. HVD.

Valentine is a day in which a child with an arrow goes around shooting people. I am a victim too! HVD.

I will never say that I care about money and materialistic things more than I do about you. But it is my Papa’s advice that I spend all my money on good purposes only.

Today is the 14th of February, also known as St. Valentine’s day. Women may call it love day, but men consider it extortion day. Do you?

I sometimes feel like I could just murder you – but then, who would hold me the way you do? You are the love of my life. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Although I am deathly afraid of heights, I would unhappily climb the tallest mountain just to shout your name, but then, I am surely going to cry afterward. Love you, my Valentine!

Funny Valentine Messages for Husband

The best Valentine’s Day is priceless – no expenses at all. Happy Valentine’s, buddy!

I have never seen anyone as caring and romantic as you are. Maybe this is why you are still single!

Love is in the air. So why don’t you hold your breath? 😛 Happy Valentine’s Day.

Today, I am celebrating Independence Day, as thankfully, I am still single! Happy Valentine’s Day, my buddies.

BFs are temp, friends are forever. Accept this, buddy. Let us spend this Valentine’s Day drunk as a monkey!

My friends are the craziest, weirdest people I know, but I adore them.

A little tip for lovers – do not confess anything until and unless you are really getting married. Happy Valentine’s Day.

If you remain single for the next two years, you could really consider dating yourself. Because darling, you are one of a kind, and there is no one like you! Happy Valentines’ Day!

The power of the human mind is unlimited. Anyone can create an imaginary Valentine for themselves! Then buddy, why are you so sad?

Even God couldn’t help you find someone in all these years. Maybe he is not yet born, or maybe he is from Mars. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Every Valentine’s Day creates a big enough hole in my pocket that needs the entire year to get repaired. I am glad that you are still single! Happy Valentines’ Day.

Who said Valentine’s Day is only for boyfriends and girlfriends? It is also for goofballs like you. I love you, my bestie! Happy Valentine’s Day.

You may not have anyone to love, but at least your pocket money is safe and secure. Enjoy your freedom! I envy you! Happy Valentines’ Day!

I don’t mind being your security guard while you are out dating as long as you are paying for me to get drunk at the club. Happy Valentines’ Day!

If you are sad that you are alone on Valentine’s day, just remember – nobody loves you on the rest of the 355 days of the year either. Happy Valentines’ Day!

Dear buddy, wishing you a very happy Valentine’s Day. I hope you have a great time with your girlfriend as you won’t be allowed to accompany your friends for a party tonight!

Celebrating Valentine’s Day only looks good in movies. But in reality, it is just costly and horrible. Try buying a bouquet of roses, and you will know!

Going the humorous route to wow your spouse on February 14. wanted to know how? You can make them smile from ear to ear by sending them these humorous Valentine’s Day texts. It is past time for you to text your sweetheart with the same dull messages they have been getting for years. Send them this unique Funny Valentine Messages for Friends this year.

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